Do guys have platonic girlfriends
Tom, 27, first noticed that his friendships were skewing womanward in college. Friendships between men and women are on the rise in the U. He attributed the reported discrepancy to the subjectivity of relationships, and concluded that an equal percentage of men and women have platonic friendships. I attribute the difference to typical male hubris.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Steve Harvey Keeps it Real about Women With Male Friends
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Why Men and Women Cant be friendsContent:
- Men and women can never be friends - but sex has nothing to do with it
- Can committed men and women have platonic friends of the opposite sex? The results are in
- Can a Man and a Woman Really Have a Platonic Relationship?
- 9 Men Tell Us How Badly Their “Completely Platonic” Female Friends Turn Them On
- The Men Who Have Mostly Female Friends
- Can Men Really Be "Just Friends" with Women?
- The Widespread Suspicion of Opposite-Sex Friendships
- Why Every Man Needs Platonic Female Friends
Men and women can never be friends - but sex has nothing to do with it
Dear Readers: It all started with a letter from "Irritated Girlfriend," who didn't want her boyfriend to go over to a female friend's apartment for dinner and a movie. I suggested she share her feelings with her man, but not forbid her boyfriend's friendship.
To limit him is to not trust him. Many readers, particularly one female referred to as "Usually Love Your Column," thought I was dead wrong. I appealed to other readers to share their thoughts. The results: an 80 percent, 20 percent split -- mostly on my side. But after reading the 20 percent who disagreed, there was one variable I should have mentioned: While it's wrong to control a significant other's friendships, a partner can always demand respect from a significant other's friends -- especially friends of the opposite sex.
Anything less is threatening, uncomfortable and unacceptable. But really, when it comes down to it, what kind of significant other would want to spend quality time alone with a friend of the opposite sex who disrespects the love of his or her life and has nothing nice to say? The answer -- not one worth keeping.
I don't think you're naive at all. In fact, I feel sorry for "Usually" if she really believes that a man and a woman "should not be alone together unless they intend to take it further.
If this woman can't go over to a male friend's house and have dinner and talk with him without ending up in bed, that's a problem that she has. I've been happily married for four years, and throughout that whole time, we have continued to be with friends of the opposite sex -- sometimes even alone. There's never been anything inappropriate. As you said, it's all about trust. Without trust, you don't really have a relationship; you have a couple of people who are together until they find someone they like more.
I think you offered "Irritated Girlfriend" perfect advice. She has every right to complain. Doing so tells her boyfriend that she doesn't necessarily trust his friend's motives. However, forbidding him to see the friend tells her boyfriend that she doesn't trust him, and that will tear the relationship apart. Dear Spouses: Thanks for loving my column -- I love writing it.
I wanted to emphasize this quote from your note. It's perfect: "without trust, you don't really have a relationship; you have a couple of people who are together until they find someone they like more.
Dear Harlan: Regarding opposite-sex friends, telling your girlfriend or boyfriend that he or she can't have platonic friendships with members of the opposite sex is tantamount to saying you don't trust him or her.
If you can't trust the person you're with, why are you with that person? I realize that insecurity can lead to jealousy, I feel twinges of it myself, but I also realize that holding my partner emotionally hostage is not the way to keep her.
Dear Male Reader: Fantastic use of the word "tantamount" first time used in this column, but sorry, no prizes. With mail carriers, delivery people, online connections and maintenance workers making house calls, there are plenty of great opportunities for trapped partners to cheat without leaving the house. It's not a friend issue -- definitely a trust issue. Write Harlan at harlan helpmeharlan. All letters submitted become property of the author.
Send paper to Help Me, Harlan! Clark St.
Can committed men and women have platonic friends of the opposite sex? The results are in
Let's say that a man and a woman are friends. They have known each other for a while and nothing has ever happened between them. By "nothing," they mean that they've never kissed. The chemistry between them is palpable and they've been in situations where he could have made a move but he did not.
Billy Crystal made the argument long ago that women and men could never successfully become friends. His case in When Harry Met Sally was built on what he argued was a person's inability to trust his or her latent lust, which ultimately sabotages any relationship. As he so eloquently put it: "The sex part always gets in the way. In the almost years since the film's release, a lot has happened in relationships and how we understand them. This tired notion that men and women can't be friends is not only wrong -- it's unhealthy.
Can a Man and a Woman Really Have a Platonic Relationship?
Can men and women be "just friends? Men report more sexual interest in their female friends than their female friends do in them, and men are also more likely than women to overestimate how romantically interested their friends are in them. In most cases, sexual attraction within a friendship is seen as more of a burden than a benefit, the study finds. Friendship is an interesting area to study because it doesn't have obvious reproductive advantages, Bleske-Rechek told LiveScience. Evolutionary psychologists often focus on sexual relationships and familial relationships, under the assumption that humans evolved to pass on their own genes to the next generation. But friends don't share genetic ties or offspring, and yet they still help each other out. Bleske-Rechek and her colleagues were interested in how heterosexual, opposite-sex friends dealt with issues of sexual attraction that might come up in their friendships. First, they recruited 88 pairs of opposite-sex college-age friends to fill out questionnaires about their friendship. The researchers had pairs of friends come in so they could be sure that each member of the pair agreed that they were in a friendship, preventing one-sided relationships from muddying the waters.
9 Men Tell Us How Badly Their “Completely Platonic” Female Friends Turn Them On
There are many discreet ways of doing this. What company does he or she keep? How do they migrate the putrid waters of social media? What they will and will not put up with, where the lines are. Of course it ended, you think to yourself, he had a poster of Delta Goodrem in his bedroom!
In , When Harry Met Sally posed a question that other pop-cultural entities have been trying to answer ever since: Can straight men and women really be close friends without their partnership turning into something else? According to The Office , no. According to Lost in Translation , yes. According to Friends … well, sometimes no and sometimes yes.
The Men Who Have Mostly Female Friends
Dear Readers: It all started with a letter from "Irritated Girlfriend," who didn't want her boyfriend to go over to a female friend's apartment for dinner and a movie. I suggested she share her feelings with her man, but not forbid her boyfriend's friendship. To limit him is to not trust him. Many readers, particularly one female referred to as "Usually Love Your Column," thought I was dead wrong.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: What GUYS Think About Their Female Friends!
Please refresh the page and retry. Can men and women ever be just friends? According to one new survey, the answer is a straight no. Social network MeetMe polled 6, of its users and found that more than half of people said they have fantasised about sleeping with their best friend of the opposite gender. The numbers seem pretty damning.
Can Men Really Be "Just Friends" with Women?
Questions like: How close is he to that female friend? How often do they hang out? Do they spend time alone? How sexy is she? Is she single? What do they do together?
The Widespread Suspicion of Opposite-Sex Friendships
Why Every Man Needs Platonic Female Friends